Do you ever feel stabby about all the ads and commercials for picture-perfect mother-daughter Mothers’ Day outings, from brunches to pedis to long warm Facetime chats?

You don’t want to get all bitchy and jealous, because it’s not like anyone’s fault they still have a great relationship with a living, healthy mother, but…

If you are dealing with the effect of feeling like you are on the outside, looking in, for seemingly endless weeks of what many describe as a Hallmark holiday, you are not the only one.

It took me a long time to start processing my mother loss and grief, and longer still to realize that this process is a journey I will always be on. (Unlike Paris, which I’ll be leaving shortly, boo-hoo!)

The good news is, mother loss doesn’t have to be awful all the time. And, unlike Rose clinging to Jack’s hand in Titanic, we don’t have to let go. Our relationship with our missing mothers can be magical and empowering and a thing of beauty and connection, not merely loss and pain.

Mothers’ Day, for me, is now a time I connect with my mother, emotionally, and practice self-care. That might look like something pink and bubbly to drink, or soak in, it might mean watching a favorite movie or buying myself flowers or diving into a juicy book.

What does your Mothers’ Day self-care look like?